It’s exciting and can be a lot of fun to get to know new people. But don’t you think it starts to feel like a chore when you label the procedure “dating”? Because most daters now meet online, setting up the first date is no longer merely a matter of exchanging numbers and debating whether to text after one or two days. Online dating is extremely popular, but it is also considerably more difficult, especially for men. Here’s a list of all the reasons a man thinks online dating is tough.
1. The Filter Mentality
Women develop a filter mentality thanks to dating apps. When women are at bars, it is tough to keep guys out. It is because, in the real world, there are far more non-apparent elements at play than there are in a dating app. Thanks to an app, a lady may swipe left on males who don’t meet her particular criteria. On the other hand, a user’s personality is filtered by apps that analyze and categorize them to the point where they can’t be seen. It’s simple for women to make a “must-have” list when they don’t know someone personally.
Almost every woman’s must-have list includes a few items. Her new love must be at least yay-tall, have a terrific professional title, be of a specific ethnicity, have at least a college degree, and be insanely attractive. It may sound harsh, but who can blame her for being selective when she’s getting hundreds of matches every day through various dating apps? When men swipe right indiscriminately, she doesn’t have to settle. It gives her the sense of being highly sought after. So, how can you stay relevant when women become pickier as a result of filter features?
Reflecting your personality through your bio can cut through the filter bias. Users of dating apps are stripped of their individuality. Make a lasting impression by writing a great bio. Allow a sense of humor to be your x-factor. Avoid repetition in your photos, do not post selfies, and include photos from your most recent international excursion. And, if you want to dip your toes into the ocean of online dating, meet here the love of your life and thank us later!
2. Abundance Of Choices
Because so many individuals use apps to find dates, the number of people using any specific site or app might be overwhelming. How do you distinguish yourself from the rest of the pack? When do you know it’s time to put your phone down? What if the person of your dreams is only a click away, but you’re exhausted from staring at your computer screen? From the beginning, there are a lot of what-ifs.
When you factor in the aspect that there are hundreds of dating apps to choose from, the whole thing can feel dismal. However, the variety is to your advantage: you’ll be able to talk to friends and read reviews of different apps before deciding on the best one. Plus, if life gets too busy, nothing is stopping you from trying more than one app or taking a break from online dating. It’s a lot, and dating should be enjoyable rather than a hassle. So, don’t let it get to you.
3. Waiting Time Is Excruciating
Wouldn’t it be great if online dating could be completed in just 24 hours? Unfortunately, this is not the case. On the first day you post your profile, you might have a few pleasant (but quick) talks, but meeting right away could be a warning flag.
Plus, because each dating app has so many users, the odds of meeting your soulmate on the first day aren’t in your favor. Furthermore, many people are more casual about online dating—or have their notifications set up to remove some of the anxiety—and may not notice your message right away.
Some people save checking their dating app messages for the evenings or weekends. For some, it’s nerve-wracking, but for others, it’s a lifesaver. Don’t get disheartened if you don’t get a response right away.
4. Writing A Good Message Can Be Tough
Perhaps the most challenging aspect of internet dating is writing that first message. How can you strike the right balance of casual and genuine interest?
It’s a good start to go beyond a single syllable. While it may be so complicated that you’d prefer to sit back and wait for someone to message you, you’ll need to stretch yourself at least a little.
Go beyond simply admiring a photograph or pressing a “like” button. Send them a message about anything specific they mentioned in their profile, especially if it’s something you share. You don’t have to write more than a couple of sentences. In fact, you shouldn’t. When you’re writing a novel, you come across as both self-absorbed and a touch too forceful.
5. Fearing What Comes Next
So, what happens after someone responds? It’s very typical for some internet discussions to peter out. However, you’ll soon want to meet in person, so you’ll switch to texting (avoid people who seem to be looking for a perpetual pen pal). One of you will have to suggest going on a date, and figuring out where to take someone new can be a challenge in itself.
Find a place you enjoy, but it isn’t necessarily a usual hangout spot and isn’t likely to be a place where you’ll run into your friends—that can make things awkward, no matter how great they are. If they say no, it can be hard to recommend a specific date and time, but it opens the door for them to suggest another date. If they don’t, there’s no need to ghost them; instead, take it as an indication that they aren’t ready to see you right away.
Again, online dating can be difficult. That is correct. It is, however, a speedier and, in many cases, more efficient manner of meeting someone with similar interests. Take a deep breath and then jump right in. The individuals you’ll be talking to will likely find it difficult as well, which makes for a good ice breaker.